Here is a clip from what I assume is last night’s Dancing with the Stars because I don’t own a TV and if I did it wouldn’t be set to some dancing show not matter how much of a mail order bride cock tease who won’t fuck you unless you pay her enough and promise her citizenship on your Russian vacation Karina Smirnoff is but I assume they are trying to keep things fresh, because Mya was doing the Lambada and everyone knows that the Lambada is the forbidden dance and that means it’s meant to go down in small Brazilian town and not on national TV, not that I am that offended by its misrepresentation, or because the entertainment industry ruins all that is sacred to me, because the lambada is not sacred to me, but because where I always thought Lamabada meant dirty, condomless penetration to music, and now I’m forced to realize I was wrong.

I made friends with a black dude outside some hotel lobby. He was drunk and talking to every 18 year old girl who walked into the place. He’d tell them that he liked their dress or that they were beautiful and kept this up for about 30 minutes to different groups of girls, always singling out the ugliest one in the group. He started chatting me up. He was freaking out about all this young pussy and told me that he was laying the groundwork. He saaid that girls are hooked on black dudes and that all girls want a daddy. Since he was in his 50s, he was working that angle.

The next thing I know, I am in the hotel bar with the dude, who is buying me drinks and all these hot young girls rush him because he was so nice to them when they walked in and was a familiar face amongst all the chachi losers with bottles of Grey Goose trying to bag them.

Within 10 minutes, this friendly older guy these girls were running to for safety is making out with almost every one he spoke to walking in. They were all taking turns with him, so while 10 girls are crowded around him waiting for a turn, I’m confused to shit as to what I am experiencing.

The bad news was that I didn’t get the spillover of girls he didn’t want, because he wanted all of them, but I did get to see some ass and titties as dude playfully lifted and pulled down their dresses for me. He only to get a friendly slap on the shoulder by the girls he pretty much violated as to say “oh Mr Old Strange Pervert Black Man, You’re So Silly”, knowing that if I did it, I’d get arrested so I ended up leaving because the world is not fair.

I guess that has nothing to do with Mya in a bikini since she’s not young, and hot anymore buy I guess she’s black enough to remind me of my new friend who I will never see again….