I am being lazy today. It happens. I am not inspired from anything going on and I only woke up at noon. That’s the luxury of being an unemployed piece of shit who drinks too fucking much and stays up until all hours of the night trying to find love.

This video came my way from Complex magazine, the same people who featured me as one of the Men of 2008, which hasn’t done much for me but has given me credibilty in the shit that I write so that people send me hate mail, I have that stamp approval to win all arguments and until the person I am battling is man of the year too, I just can’t take them seriously.

Speaking of battling, here’s some video of Olivia Munn beat boxing like she was a brother in the 80s who couldn’t afford a boombox but needed to provide a beat for her rapping friends only she’s doing it 20 years too late. I fuckin’ hate beat boxing with a passion and find it completely unnecessary and on the same level of talent as a 5 year old who can burp the alphabet or my wife who can make fart sounds with her bare sticky back when she suctions it up against the wall.

Either way, she’s talking about panties and fucking and smelly pussy and that’s every virgin loser who likes comics, videogames and masturbating’s dream.

Virgins like Olivia Munn and I like making fun of virgins, especially when they are in their late 20s who collect action figures, who love comic books and who spend their lives hiding in their apartment filled with computer equipment. The same kind of virgin who got excited when Geek Chic became popular 5 years ago, thinking that it was finally their time to shine, until that fad faded fast, leaving them alone to watch TV shows designed for teenage girls, even though they are more sexually inexperienced than teenage girls and can hardly relate to the subject matter and other shit like G4TV because they have a crush on the host who pretends she can relate to geeks by reading a script and lookin’ decent enough for the geeks to feel like they really have someone they can connect with, even though she’s on TV and not on their couch watching Star Trek with them.

None of that matters, what does matter is that Olivia Munn got into her bikini again for the geeks to get more excited about how hot they think she is, but that hotness is probably 95 percent delusion that she’s actually into the same shit as they are - when in reality, she’s just into the paycheck and the whole getting on TV thing because every girl who thinks she’s hot also thinks she deserves fame and fortune, even when they don’t and the closest they can get is a third rate show on a third rate cable channel only losers care about.

So I don’t really know who Oliva Munn is, but know she has a huge geek following, at least enough of one to have found and released pictures stolen from her Myspace while sitting on it waiting for this day to come for the last 5 months, that I had no choice but to post it….

Since Oliva Munn is on some Geek TV channel with some Geek TV show that actually featured me once, I have no choice but to post her bikini pictures on this site to accommodate the one virginal motherfuckers who found me while jerking off to her show while building his Star Trek model. If only you could channel that brain power and multitasking skills into something a little more productive, you’d have a better chance of moving out of your mom’s basement and break into the real world where real girls could be drunk enough to let you manipulate them to go back to your apartment to fuck, but I guess that’s a shitty trade off from always having food in the fridge and your laundry folded and bed always made, because sex is scary, especially when it’s uncharted territory….

Either way, It’s my way of paying G4TV back

I don’t watch G4TV because I have had sex but you gotta give them some respect for what they are doing by hiring a slut like Olivia Munn because it gives virgins everywhere the hope that they will find a hot, big breasted fantasy girl like the ones they see in their comic books, who actually knows and understands their interests, even though she’s not all that hot but is to someone who has never fucked before she is, That’s not saying much though, considerin when you’ve never had pussy before, a bowl of jello looks like a hot fuck to you, but that’s just because you can eat it when you’re done.

I guess the good news for the non virgins out there is that this bitch is out at an event showing off her big old tits and no matter how many times you fuck in a day, you will always love tits, but if you’re reading this site and looking at pictures of some girls cleavage here, you probably aren’t so much of a non virgin, even though you count that time you stuck the tip in.

Speaking of tip, I was at a coffee shop the other day with a handful of change. After paying for my shit I decided to give the cute girl a tip because she was wearing a low-cut shirt and not the same kind of tip you consider counts as losing your viriginity. I accidentally dropped all the money I had in her tip jar and couldn’t figure out how to get it back without getting caught. I decided that I wasn’t going to be homeless about the shit and fish through her tip jar like some desperate motherfucker in need of a smoke, which I am but don’t like to advertise that fact, so instead I just took the entire tip jar and ran. I feel like the 5 dollars I threw in made it mine. and it was a great purchase because it had 20 dollars in it.