America’s favorite emo queen Wentz is at his stupidity again. This time he is trying to fuck with the public by pretending to use his bagel as a cell phone. I think he’d be more effective at throwing us all off if he put out a sex tape with Ashlee Simpson proving to the world that he actually has a dick. This little man, or so he claims, annoys the fuck out of me because he’s a fuckin’ fake. The only time I find this kind of thing funny is when it involves drunk crazy homeless people who actually think the phonebooth is an outhouse. This dude thinks he’s more important than he is and his energy as a celebrity would be better spent killing himself.

I realize why Pete Wentz married Ashlee Simpson, it’s because she’s the only one stupid enough to find his sense of humor and broken artist act charming and believable enough to have sex with and he had to do whatever the fuck he could to lock that shit down for fear of spending the rest of his life alone because he knows that the rest of the world knows he’s full of shit.

So dude’s decides to make a funny little mask out of a paper plate pretending to be selling ad space on his face because he feels like a walking billboard because people are all looking at him and thinks it’s funny to play off on that with this stupidity, in some sort of high school musical performance art project.

What dude doesn’t seem to realize that the only reason people give a fuck about him is because he’s some record label’s marketing tool to reach 14 year old girls, and in reality is a walking billboard for them in hopes of selling records because he sold his useless crying emotional and sexually confused soul to the devil when he got into this business so his bullshit comedic attempt doesn’t really translate very well.

He isn’t some misunderstood artist, he is just a tool being used, and paid accordingly by the bigger corporation that owns him. So as he tries to be punk rock about things, and while his cunt wife giggles because she thinks he’s being so crazy and that this whole thing is so fucking funny and wild, since she’s a fuckin’ sheltered idiot with no talent and has no idea what the fuck is going on, the rest of the world just shakes their head in disappointment and wait for the day that we read about a newlywed couple involved in a murder-suicide.

I guess the good news is that at least they have found each other and the funny thing is that if someone was to email his “douchebag.com” email, he’d only get to keep about 10% of the profits after running it by his management, label and PR team because this motherfucker is already owned as he is out promoting clothing companies, future record releases and closet-case sexual confusion. I hate this 5 foot 4 insecure piece of shit and what he doesn’t know is that he’s not making a joke, he is a fucking joke and his wife is fuckin’ ugly.

I guess Ashlee Simpson is trying to get some attention, you know living in her sister’s shadow all her life’s gotta give the ugly sister a little complex. A complex that bisexual Pete Wentz is all about because it draws more attention to him and his emotionally driven bisexual make-up wearing music.

In this video from his blog that someone emailed me, not that I found on my own, because I don’t really follow his career, dude and Ashlee joke about having a baby while Ashlee pretends to be Britney Spears eating her Cheetos and speaking with a Southern Accent, one that isn’t too far from her own accent.

I guess what it comes down to is that if Ashlee was actually a fraction of Britney Spears she’d be worth talking about, but instead she’s the Simpson table scraps who was just lucky enough to have a sister with money to afford the kind of exposure and lifestyle she lives with her bisexual boyfriend.

I guess the good news in all this is that they won’t be making any babies anytime soon, Pete Wentz is only into ass play, so Ashlee may not be a pop queen but she takes it up the ass and she may not be a Pop Queen but she is an Anal Queen and that’s important to me and should be to you too, because bitches who take it up the ass are hard to find.

Here are some pictures of Ashlee Simpson kissing some androgynous Spanish K.D. Lang looking motherfucker. I know it’s the lil ‘mo from Fall Out Boy and I know that they have been together for a while and I fucking hate him. I don’t know if it is because I hate their music or if it is because I hate his rat face or if it is because he’s a little guy who’s always out there acting tough, fighting bouncers and scrapping like a little big man because has his bouncers/body guards who are paid to defend him and hold the fucker he’s going after down, letting him go home feeling like a bigger little big man….

Either way, I saw one of these dudes who tried to fight me with his crew a few months ago. They were mad that I asked one of their baby momma’s for before and after pregnancy vagina shots. It was a serious medical inquiry because I wanted to know what kind of damage was done. It wasn’t to jerk off to, since I can’t jerk off, and it wasn’t to spread around the internet, it was for my own personal library, because most of the pussy I’ve ever seen has been post pregnancy, because single mom’s with drug addiction are easy. So anyway, I see one of the guys alone, walk up to him and say “hey tough guy, what you going to do without your crew” and took a picture of him with the chick I was with’s camera. Either way, when standing alone in the bar, dude was a bigger pussy than I looked like when trying to back out of the fight when they tried to fuck with me and I just left it at that is because I am not 20 anymore, I am fat, slow and lazy and I refuse to fight over shit I say on the internet, because I like to tell people it’s not real life and I know you may take offense to that because it’s the only thing you live for and it’s your only form of interaction, but you’re not an example to anyone, you’re pretty much a loser….but at least I love you….send nudes of chicks.

Here are those Ashlee Simpson and her gay looking boyfriend kissing pics looks like dudes has his hand between her legs, wishing he’d find a cock…