I am fucking hurting today, I woke up surprised to be alive because last night was seriously fucking abusive on myself, just look at my stepLINKS post written at 6 am while fuckin’ destroyed, but it turns out that my fast beating heart, dizziness, shakes, pains and memories of stupidities from last night aren’t as hurting as my computer that wouldn’t let me access the blog all day and it turns out that my computer having AIDS, randomly shutting off, crashing and overall sucking dick is not as hurting as Selma Blair in a bikini. In all fairness this is her first job in a long time, she’s almost 40 and she’s supposed to be dumpy lookin’ in this role. I’d still fuck her like the pillow case full of mash potatoes she looks like she’d feel like…

That’s the first post of the day. I hope you liked it.

Selma Blair was on TRL yesterday and she has pretty hot skinny legs, and that’s really the only reason I am posting these pictures, because I just found out that she is 36 years old. I thought she was in her 20s and I was wrong, it happens. Like the time I was drunk and watching fetish porn really loud and the police came to investigate because they got complaints that a girl was being violated or hurt in my apartment. They asked to look around and I let them in because I hadn’t been raping any girls and was just wathing girls getting raped and I told them that the only illegal activity I was doing that day was a lot of cocaine and pointed to my 8 ball. It lead to me getting arrested for cocaine possession, but I got off because they didn’t have a warrant. Those were pretty much my glory days.

I am all for girls with small tits, so here are some pictures of Selma Blair in her bikini playing with her non existent tits.

She reminds me of the 45 year old whore last night who was built like a 12 year old boy and who for some reason had all the guys makin’ it rain on that ho. A guy I was with wanted to see why she was so popular because she looked like a budget stripper that would affordable to poor people during the recession but figured that she had some secret moves….He left me alone for about 5 minutes before coming back with a disgusted look on his face.

I asked what happened and he told me she stuck her ass in his face and it smelled like shit. I decided to take it up with the management because I am self-serving and wanted to get a free drink out of my friend’s traumatic experience, but the manager just told me that was her trick, she wouldn’t wash her junk because that’s what her clients want. So this 45 year old mother, who probably gets fucked a lot both for money and for the feeling of being wanted, doesn’t wash her fucking vagina and that is how she makes all her money….and I got jealous because it seems like a pretty easy gig.

I guess the real question is what Selma Blair’s ass smells like…because I know that’s what you’re into….