So to balance out the day, I figured I’d throw up these Serena Williams bikini pictures, even though I linked these fuckers in the stepLINKS last night. If you’re wondering what I mean by balance shit out, I am not talking about throwing this thick piece of ass on a scale to prove that her workout regime has gone totally fucking wrong, I am not really sure what I am talking about, but I was thinking along the lines of since my last 2 posts were of chicks in bikinis, I should give some airtime to dudes in a bikini.

I think it’s safe to say that her boyfriend is wallet fucking her or trying to get ahead in his own career as a possible hip hop MC or some shit and getting in paparazzi pictures is a solid way to promote yourself because there is no way he’s with her because she’s a good fuck or because she’s a gentle lady.

All the masking your sexuality and taking female hormones all because her dad wanted a champion tennis player can make any dude pretty fucking pissed off. I remember this one time I was drunk and passed out at a party and some chick put make up on me. I looked really pretty and felt like I had been raped. Taking away someone’s manhood is probably the worst kind of abuse a person can endure and making bitch live the role so well so that she doesn’t give up the jig when she goes out in public in lady’s bikinis is totally humiliating.

She’s the kind of girl who doesn’t have a vagina, so it’s in the ass everyday and I am not talking about in her ass, I am talking about in your ass. All the hard training and loses in her sport means she’s gotta take her aggression and frustration out somewhere….

I know that everyone is saying that she’s a dude and that it’s a pretty obvious joke. I am sure she’s a nice person who just does too much weight lifting to scare all the dainty tennis chicks off the court. It’s like facing the monster at the end of a video game only the real life version and she makes millions because of it. If I could make millions doing anything, I’d probably do it. If I was creative, I would have come up with a whole other angle, but I’m not creative so suck my dick and while your at it, jerk off to this bitch’s dick. Gaylord.

I was contacted by a retried runway Model from New England. She told me some stories of doing coke, having an eating disorder and retiring from her career when she 24 or some shit. She wanted to write for the site and this is what she came up with for these Carrie Underwood pics….

Here is Carrie Underwood, continuing to milk Idol fame by wearing a hot outfit and pretending to play softball. Bitch is working it for softball/baseball season to promote her shitty country song about some guy cheating on her ass.

Personally, I love the song because it’s a good chick song to scream when you’re driving but I’m a hypocrite because I am dating a married man. Anyway. I’d work that shit, too, if I had such a crappy song on the radio

I think it is pretty fucking boring. I guess she’s fired too. She could written about getting fucked or loving dick or masturbating instead she talks about screaming along to a chick song. If I wrote this post I don’t know what angle I would have taken because I am feeling fucking stupid with a serious lack of sleep, but I am sure it would have been better than this trash…Maybe about when I used to watch the girls in my highschool practice soccer in shorts like this so that I could watch their tits bounce, or maybe talk about how girls who play sports scare me because they are more man that I’ll ever be, but I didn’t write this post and that’s why it sucks.Thanks for nothing asshole.

I know that some of your fuckers are major sports fans because your lives are seriously lacking something and you like the distraction. When you are bored you are either looking up sport stats to bet on the games or looking up pictures of blonde chicks with big fake tits to jerk off to. The reason I know that you assholes like sports is because I get emails about how I don’t do enough sports content, but the blonde chicks with fake tits are what keep you coming back. I think Michelle Marsh is up on this shit and realizes that the key to her success now that she’s already showed us all her big fake tits is to hit up the sports market by wearing a British soccer bikini, because even if England isn’t your team at least you sports fanatics can pretend she’s into watching the game while drinking a beer with you. It’s got nothing to do with the fact that she’s probably already fucked 3/4 of the team.

If you’re wondering why I was never into team sports, it’s simple. I suck at them. I don’t understand wasting time trying to kick balls or shoot baskets or throw touchdowns, I think it’s a distraction from what’s important and that is getting drunk. I think that working with a bunch of dudes towards menial success like winning is just a way to trick yourself that you have purpose. Reality is that the local pick-up game doesn’t mean shit in the grand scheme of the world. That’s not to say that what I spend my time doing does have any kind of impact, but at least I am wallowing in self-pity while drunk, instead of tricking myself into thinking I am good at something because I ended up on the team with the Ethiopian dude who can run faster than a cheetah because he spent his life running away from Cheetahs who tried to eat him. I guess the other reason I hate sports is the whole gay factor of a group of men in the shower and slapping each other’s asses in a testosterone rage and there is the small issue with me not being physically fit enough to walk up a flight of stairs. Hard living motherfucker, it takes it’s toll….

Either way, Here’s Michelle Marsh Manipulating You in a Bikini.

Eva Longoria is one of those socially conscious celebrities who goes to charity events out of the kindness of her heart and not for publicity because she cares about the world and using her “reach” as a celebrity to make a difference, so who am I to not post the pictures of the event where she played some charity volleyball to bring awareness to whatever the fuck the cause is while showing off her ass.

I am hungover and can barely focus on the screen, so I see is her ass and even though that is the real reason I am posting these, I do think she should be an example to other celebrities on how to make a difference in the world, while still showing her ass.

I guess what it all comes down to is that I am a charitable cause that people should start donating to….

Ok - So I haven’t quite got the fat slob strippers out of my system, I wish I wasn’t poisoned by what I saw, but I can’t really help it. I feel this is what kids feel like when they see their parents fuck. I never really knew my parents because my mother was a hooker in Mexico and my dad was one of her John’s, at the time of her death, we had narrowed it down to 10 potential clients of hers, but that doesn’t really matter, what does matter is that she always banged in front of me, but it was her job so I don’t think it was that traumatic, or as traumatic as it would be for you to think of your mom on all fours taking it from your dad….

Either way, these Stacy Keibler playing volleyball pics, remind me that not all girls are lazy slobs who don’t realize they are lazy slobs and decide to live the hot girl with insecurities and daddy issues life as a stripper. Let’s hope that that is all I really have to say about this….because it’s starting to get boring, I know. Just look at the pics…Cuddles…..