Some dude who is in a shitty straight to DVD movie called Bachelor Party 2 reached out to his Facebook friends, and I happen to be one of them, to show off one of the clips from this depressingly shitty comdey that I can’t believe was produced…so I decided to send him this message….
This is the kind of shit movie that I can’t believe gets the green light. It’s gotta be nepotism, you know a studio head giving his drug addicted son a project to keep him out of trouble, or maybe they need to produce a certain number of low budget shitty movies that go straight to DVD like they were the Olsen Twins and Bachelor Party 2 was Holiday in the Sun, but the truth is that this just makes me suicidal every time I can’t pay my rent, because the comedy is cheap, no offense or anything…
I am sure it’s something you are proud of and excited about, I don’t mean to rain on any parades or anything, and for the record, I’ve never been in a movie, so who cares what I think, maybe I am just jealous, or maybe I’m just right that you were involved in something I like to compare to AIDS in the sense that shit has the same impact on the film industry as AIDS has on the sex trade. It kills the fuckin’ vibe by making us wear condoms. Get it?
Love
Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com
That probably has nothing to do with the stepFORUM, and wasn’t quite mean enough but dude still deleted me as a friend and I did get an email from a slut who’s amateur slutty pics were posted in the Porn forum asking to remove the images, meaning shit’s getting bigger and unstoppable. You need to get involved motherfucker….
Here’s some of the latest action going down there….
———Celebs———
Miley Cyrus takes her bike around the neighborhood GO
I saw some serious racial profiling the other day, I was walking down the street and a 20 year old black dude was waiting at the bus stop with his white girlfriend. I assume the white cops didn’t like where that was heading because they pulled the fuck over and asked the motherfucker for ID, where he was going and all that shit, all with their hands on their guns. They left me completely alone and I felt bad for the dude because he looked innocent enough, but I still put my wallet in my front pocket when I walked by him and my hand becase I didn’t want to get mugged, especially with the cops there, it’d be pretty embarrassing.
That’s the kind of racism, you probably won’t find on the forum, here’s a little more action goin on there. I haven’t posted an update in a while….so get busy.
I got an email from the forum today that went like this:
How do you change that “gayer than bicycle shorts” line under my name?
My response:
You stop wearing your mother’s pantyhose while jerking off, and by jerking off I mean trying to make yourself cum by prostate simulation by shoving random household objects in your ass, while watching gay porn.
With Love,
Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com
Here’s some of the good shit going on in the forum……
The stepFORUM’s been up for about a year now. We should organize a birthday party for it. It’s actually done pretty fucking amazing, better than I expected when I agreed to put it up on the site. It has been about sharing things people find interesting, funny, important and despite being pretty fucking primitive way of doing the whole online community shit with things like facebook out there, people still manage to make an appearance and contribute, not enough nude girls but definitely enough music, movies, pictures and porn
So show some love and get involved. Here’s a glimpse of what’s going on in there today.
I am confused. I decided that I was feeling like a winner. So I walked around the street asking random people for a quarter to call my wife because my stepdaughter was injured in a car accident and my cellphone battery died, I even showed them my turned off cell to make my performance more real. I ended up getting about 40 quarters, I guess there are some good people left in the world, I like to think I am to, because despite my lying for profit, I was still bringing the good out of people.
I knew I wasn’t going to go big with 20 dollars, so played the robotic horse races until 7 in the morning drunk, because I befriended an alcoholic Chinaman with a mickey of rice wine and by the end of my money, I thought I was at the fuckin’ races and he was one of the Jockey’s. It was a small price to pay to not have to sleep with my wife.
Either way, I haven’t been on the forum in a while because I can’t download shit onto this computer, so this probably isn’t the best of the forum but it’s just a couple of things to keep you entertained while I figure out what day it is because whatever that asian dude gave me has destroyed everything inside me.
I think I have writer’s block. I am having a harder time writing posts than the girl I just saw had trying to keep her skirt down in the wind, and I can tell you every stain, wrinkle and detail of her boy short underwear the whole street saw. I feel like I have nothing to say because nothing is inspiring, that doesn’t mean that I am going to give up the fucking site, but it could mean that I am dying. It also means that I am slow moving as fuck and feel like I am going to pass out. I didn’t even drink as much as I usually do last night, so this is all unexpected. The good news is that the people in the forum are helping me out and this is the reason why….
I almost got in fight with a crazy fat guy yesterday and it was a lot more exciting than fights that I have had on the internet. I was sitting outside of a store and he walked by me. I guess he thought I was trying to stare him down or tough guy him, when I didn’t even really realize I was looking at him and he walks up to me and asks if I have a problem and starts getting aggresive with me like shoving at me and shit.
The funniest thing about the whole thing was that we looked like long-lost poverty brothers. He was even more Ghetto than me, but mainly because instead of jogging pants, dude was wearing jogging shorts and a fanny pack, and that shit’s just embarrassing. I don’t know why the shit got difused, but it did and next thing I knew he bought some beer and invited me to hang with him in the park across the street and drink. So I did.
I feel like these kinds of unions can happen for you in the stepFORUM. Here’s a taste of what’s going up there.
———Celebs———
Lindsay Lohan and her lesbian out & about in LA GO
Audrina Patridge and Her Great Cleavage Shopping GO
I heard Kim Kardashian was coming to Montreal so I called on as many favors as I could to get into the event. Since I don’t know anyone affiliated with the chachi, drug money, thugged out bar where people may not get shot at, but probably could, since it’s fucking sketchy as fuck or with Kim Kardashian, I decided to try walking in without getting noticed and just lying my way in. So I showed up at the door and told them I was on Kim’s personal list, they said I wasn’t there and laughed in my face without actually looking at the list, I threw a little scene like that I came all the way from New York for this shit and that Kim would be furious if I had to call her to complain and the meathead let me in. I got up to the area where Kim was and there were about 15 black guys waiting for her to show up, I stuck around for an hour but the 12 dollar drinks were too rich for my blood and I had already overdosed on shitty Ed Hardy and trashy whores who were either in the Kardashian fan club, or just thought they were Kim Kardashian, that I had to get the fuck out. I also saw 8 bouncers drag some punk out and beat him senseless and figured they wouldn’t be so forgiving to me after I got more expensive drink in me. I didn’t see Kardashian or take pictures of her ass, but I do have the stepFORUM and that’s more interesting to me. Here’s a taste of what’s going down there.
I haven’t posted an update from the forum, but that doesn’t mean a whole lot of shit is going down there. I haven’t had any nude pictures sent to me because the girls are scared about what I will do with them, but that doesn’t mean you can swindle them into sending them to you. Think of it as a bar or club where you can hustle the girls easily because hiding behind the computer allows you to hide your ugly face or other deformities that usually work against you when hustling chicks..
I am sick. I may die. If I do. I am sure you won’t be phased. But the site will live on in the stepFORUM, until the server shuts me down and then my legacy will only live in the memories of the 4 of you who read the site. So go to the stepFORUM now, so I can enjoy you while I am around to enjoy you.
HOT Audrina Patridge, Lauren Conrad, and Lauren Bosworth GO
Britney Spears in Kentwood to visit her new Niece - June 19 GO
Andie McDowell’s Daughter - Rainey Qualley Facebook Pics GO
Kristin Cavallari beautiful braless cleave in the pressroom GO
Since I’ve been pretty much squtting in various locations the last 5 days - I haven’t been able to spend much time on the internet, so I haven’t been able to seduce all the hot girls on the stepFORUM, that doesn’t mean I don’t love you girls, it just means daddy’s busy and by busy I mean trying my best not to get stabbed by this really weird angry dude I’ve been staying with. Either way, Here’s a taste of what’s going on in the stepFORUM.
———Celebs———
Michelle Trachtenberg - gorgeous at the Whitney Art Party GO
When I was out last night, I met a girl who was on crutches from some reason and I noticed all the dudes were hitting on her. I walked up to her and started chatting her up because I knew she wouldn’t be able to run away and she got to telling me that she’s been getting more male attention than ever because of the crutches and should use them when and if she heals as a tool to get a husband. I told her that dudes are like animals and when they see an injured bitch they try to get up in her because they know she can’t run away and that kind of preying is exciting. So I decided to steal her crutches from her and hide them so that she really couldn’t move. By the end of the night, I saw her making out with 2 dudes while one other fondled her tits and I felt like I make magic. I forgot to tell her where I hid them, so I figure those guys took care of her, let’s hope not by leaving her borderline lifeless body in a ditch.
The stepFORUM is bumping, you can find everything you need there, maybe not 2 dudes to make out with while they fondle your tits and gang rape you leaving your crippled body in a ditch, but it’s the internet and you can pretend. Enjoy.