It looks like when you’re Saved By The Bell, you’re not saved from middle-aged weight gain. I always had a feeling that this bitch had too much of a body at a young age to fight the inevitable which is that it just doesn’t stop until your hit by a bus while trying to cross the street on your state issued disability scooter, but the good news for Tiffani Amber is that she’s made enough money to not that phase her and that allows her to go romp around in her bikini “cliff” jumping with the girls like adult life was summer camp all the fuckin’ time.

I know she’s not that fat, but give her a couple years because my keen eye sees that shit coming faster than you do - pretty much anytime a girl offers you sex. It’s called pre-premature ejaculation and happens before the girl even gets naked for you. It’s pretty sad, but you could be worse off, at least that’s what you can tell yourself to make the pain less painful.